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| I found them one evening like this, both playing video games :) |
We all have the potential to learn new things. What and how much depends on each person's ability to learn and/or their desire to learn. Learning is something a lot of us take for granted. As school students, we were forced to go to school and learn. And as adults, I think we just navigate the world of work, parenting, and responsibility by learning as we go without giving much thought at what it is we are actually learning. Consciously deciding to learn something new might be more about stepping out of our comfort zone as we get older.
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| Photography class assignment #1: Self portrait |
I know nothing about photography and after my first class last week, I felt a little like I did sitting in chemistry class in high school. Like the information is so far over my head, I'll surely never grasp it. While I passed chemistry, the difference now is I am actually interested in learning about photography. I don't have visions of becoming an amazingly talented photographer, I just want to learn enough to be dangerous. Maybe the best thing about choosing to learn as an adult is it's more fun because you have the opportunity to pick what you're interested in....and the fact that I'm not taking the class for a grade :)
We have no idea what the future will hold for either of our girls. They are different as much in their personalities as in their abilities to learn. Casey is a bright, enthusiastic and vocal girl and, as much as I hate to admit it, I sometimes find myself almost taking for granted her ability to learn. I think we just assume she'll do well in school, go to college and one day rule the world :) Her potential is endless, but it is unfair to take that for granted because her sister's learning ability is actually her disability. As a mother, it's something I need to keep in check because I don't want Casey to ever resent us for feeling like we were on parenting auto-pilot with her.
So I will preface this week's accomplishment with admitting the guilt I have because when Casey learned to write I may not have been as overwhelmed with emotion as when Emily did it for the first time. Because little sister just did it and it felt like we were gifted the moon. One morning before school she asked me how to spell my name, so I said m-o-m and she proceeded to write just that on a piece of paper. I had to help prompt her with where to put each letter because she doesn't quite grasp that letters need to go in some order to make words just yet, but I was no less stunned when she followed my instruction and I saw
mom staring back at me on the page.
The concentration it took for her to put together the lines to make the letters and to put them in order and the interest in learning this tells me so much about her potential. Because her learning potential is such a mystery to us all. And then just to show off later that day, she not only wrote mom, but also her name. And maybe, just maybe, a little of the weight I carry on my shoulders each day worrying about what Emily is able to learn may have been lifted. And best of all, Casey was almost in tears with excitement at Emily's accomplishment, too. And I am certain that every time Emily demonstrates that she has learned something new Casey is learning something about helping and pride and overcoming obstacles.
I actually convinced Tom to go to a Toga Murder Mystery party last night (for those of you that know Tom, you take a minute to process that) and a new babysitter was going to come over and watch the girls. My friend, Jenn, hired a new babysitter last weekend and she told me how she cleaned her whole house, even the ceiling fans, to make a good impression. (Really, Jenn? Ceiling fans?) So maybe I do tidy up a bit for babysitters, but full on deep clean? Um...maybe not. But I had my two little girls bursting with excitement all day yesterday waiting for Julia to come over to play, so I decided I was going to channel that energy and teach them to clean. Growing up my sisters and I had a list of chores every Saturday that included mopping, dusting, scrubbing and vacuuming and I want to make sure my girls get that same
torture sense of responsibility, too.
As much as we think they are our princesses, we know we want them to learn the value of hard work, too. Even in high school when I played every sport that was available, I had my set of chores I needed to fit in between homework, practices, games and meets. Our girls will never be too busy to have to do chores here at home either. I have some friends that have cleaning ladies come in to help with the housework and, as with everything, I think each person needs to do what's best for their family, so no judging here. But even if I was still working, I couldn't hire a cleaning lady because I don't think I would be able to look my mom in the eye. I would somehow feel like a failure. Like I had just flushed the values she tried to instill in me down the generational toilet. As a kid I didn't have to milk cows before school like my mom did and my kids don't have to settle for only Saturday mornings and 3 channels for cartoons either. So it's not like I'm all let's-hang-on-to-the-past, but I do want our kids to know how to work hard and take care of things that are important.
And it was important to get Tom into a toga and for us to go out with other adults, so the teaching of doing dishes and dusting and vacuuming for the babysitter commenced :)
Why would I hire a cleaning lady when I have 2 (little) cleaning ladies here!! Oh, I've learned something from my mom all right :)
